My Dream Tailgate-Uncle Tito

While talking to a friend about this idea about starting a website on tailgating they had asked me a question that kind of left me dumbfounded. “What would you dream tailgate look like?” I did not have a good answer to that question and it kind of bothered me. Any tailgate is a good time, but how could I plan the perfect one? The paragraphs below are not every detail of the day but it hits on a lot of the key elements to make the day a big success.


It is a warm October day but this day is unlikely any other day. I have tickets to see the New York Giants play the Philadelphia Eagles. The key word is warm in the first sentence. (I love rocking a pair of shorts and I would wear shorts to work if they would let me, believe me I have asked.) Kickoff time for the game would be 4:05 PM. This would allow plenty of time to tailgate and of course give me and my squad the ability to watch the 1:00 games in the parking lot. Yes, only NFL REDZONE would be on, I cannot run the risk of missing a pointless TD.


In a dream world, this beloved tailgate would take place at the Linc (Lincoln Financial Field) since I live roughly 8 miles away. I love a good drive and all, but I need to make it home for the Sunday night game since it could have fantasy football implications; or the fact that my body may breakdown from the reckless abandonment I put it through at every tailgate..


The group for this tailgate is very important. I typically consider myself a bit of an extrovert. By extrovert, I mean I talk to anyone and everyone  who will listen to me. This ability to talk to people has given me the advantage of having quite a bit of friends. (Ironically, I started writing this article on Cinco De Mayo by myself with zero plans). In attendance to the tailgate I would need my home friends, college friends, frat bros and my work friends. The most important part of this group that would be there is my Fiancee. The reason she is the most important part is because, she is the brains of the operation and will be driving my sloppy drunk ass home.


Food, I fucking love food. Food is almost just as important to the tailgate as the alcohol. Food gives you fuel and substance to survive a long day. The breakfast menu would be simple yet delicious. Breakfast sandwiches served on english muffins. Eggs would be cooked in muffin tins(article for another time), cheese, and your choice of bacon, sausage or pork roll. I love protein so I would dabble with all three meats. Me going with 3 meats is probably the reason I have a high cholesterol but YOLO. The only way to wash down this tasteful breakfast would be with Mimosas, Bloody Mary’s and Screw Drivers. But, lunch is my favorite meal of the day;and  lunch at a tailgate is what separates the men from the boys. The lunch entree would be as followed; Burgers and Dogs, Sausage and peppers, Baked ziti (are you italian if you don’t eat pasta on Sunday) and a hoagie tray. Some extras to be spread out on the table would be a pretzel tray, taco dip, buff chick dip and last but not least a family size bag of SmartFood popcorn.


Booze tons and tons of booze. The thought of not having enough alcohol would turn this beautiful dream into the saddest of nightmares.  My shopping for alcohol would be simple: lots and lots Tito’s.I am a huge vodka drinker and can be usually spotted with a Tito’s and Lemonade in hand 99% of the time. Beer, I am not picky, buy my gun to my head choice will always be bud light cans. They are easy to chug, have the NFL team logos, and allows you to play beerball.


Games, I am huge fan of backyard games, college drinking games, and even board games. Playing games at a tailgate can take the party to an entirely new level. My dream lineup of games would include corn-hole, Kam-Jam, beer pong & beerball. To open up the festivities I would need a huge game of flip cup. Nothing better than chugging beer at 10 A.M and talking shit to your friends. Flip cup is also the easiest way to get everyone to come together and mingle with new people first thing in the morning. The only other accessory that I would want at this tailgate is a football. Tossing around the football prior to kickoff is a must. I said it once and I will say it again chicks dig the 18 yard out and I still got it (I actually never had it).


All of this would be my dream tailgate but to be perfectly honest, any tailgate for me would be just fine. There is nothing I enjoy more than drinking some beer, grilling some food and laughing with friends.